Helping a Grieving Friend

I have been spending a lot of time reading different blogs on the loss of babies and the processing of the grief. While I was surfing I came across an 11-part series titled "How to Help Your Grieving Friend" It was a comfort to me as I go through the loss of Selah, but it also opened my eyes to how I can help those around me. We tend to tip-toe around those who have experienced loss and in this series, Molly give some good advice.

Part 1 "How to Help Your Grieving Friend"

Part 2 "Just Know that She's Exhausted"

Part 3 "She's a Scatterbrain"

Part 4 "There is No Timetable"

Part 5 "She May Explode (but probably not)"

Part 6 "She Can't Grieve on Command"

Part 7 "Ask Her Specific Questions"

Part 8 "Avoid the Flippant Comfort of Hallmark Answers"

Part 9 "Always on My Mind"

Part 10 "10 Tips for Bringing Meals to a Grieving Friend"

Part 11 "Cleaning Her House is Next to Godliness"

Mourning

Selah Remembrance Ryken

was born into the arms of Jesus on June 21, 2010

at 8 weeks gestation.

The Balm Of God's Love

When we lose someone we love
The loss seems too great to bear
God sends us friends to comfort us
To show that He deeply cares

But in the dark hours of the night
When there’s nobody else around
When we feel the saddest and loneliest
It’s there God’s love can be found

It’s like a soothing, healing balm
To soothe our broken hearts
The healing oil poured over us
That flows into every part

We can rest secure in God’s love
And know He’s by our side
He holds us when we feel as though
A part of us has died

We can know that God will listen
When we just want to talk
And when we feel we need to cry
We can share it with the Lord

For He is always waiting there
Ready with arms open wide
As we pour out the hurt within
He pours His love inside

Our Father above loves us so much
And will never leave us alone
He will not forsake us in our need
To face this on our own

He comforts us and strengthens us
And rubs us with His balm
And as the dawn breaks through the night
We’ll awake in His loving arms.

© By M.S.Lowndes

Miscellaneous pictures

I haven't been very good at keeping up with things on this blog. Here are some pictures of the last month or so to show you what we have been up to.

Sara and Mathias reading together

School time!

Sara falling asleep at the table

Sara on her bike

Sara sleeping with her bear that is an mp3 player

Sara and Josiah

Josiah and his Wedgit robot

I can't even think of a good caption for this one. They will be embarrassed though when they see it!

Sara on her slide

Ashly and her first decorated cake. It was for Mom's birthday

Mom on her birthday

Life Chain Sunday

Sara and Geneva. SOme days they love each other, others days they don't. Some day they will be great friends.

Sara folding the laundry

Sara loves to play with my quilt fabric. Maybe she'll be a quilter some day!

Surprise Visit and more kitty pictures

This morning we were busy doing school work, when lo and behold Grandpa pulls into the driveway!  The children were all excited!  While he was here he helped Cara with her Phonics and math facts.  Then came the rousing game of UNO!

After UNO we had lunch: Cheese broccoli soup, salad, and sandwiches.

Then it was time for Grandpa to leave.  He didn't leave empty handed though, so don't worry Grandma!  He has enough liver to last for a few meals!

Here are some more Kitty pictures.  Sara is slowly starting to warm up to them, but needs to learn to be gentle.  Overall they are doing well.  They love curling up on the carpet right in front of the door, in Dad's boots, in the basket on the stroller, and on Justin sweatshirt which he left in the wagon.

Our life lately...

Life in our home lately has been very busy arranging things, learning where things are and getting adjusted to our surroundings. 

The boys and men spent Saturday afternoon chopping wood.  We have a wood furnace along with a gas furnace.  The previous owners used the wood and supplemented with the gas when it was really cold.  There are lots of fallen trees around here, so fuel is free!  Daniel was pleased because he got to buy some manly tools to cut the wood.

Jesi and I have been working on the Reformation Day costumes.  We did 2 mock-ups of vest and now are ready to cut out the real thing and get these costumes finished.  Ashly has been taking care of us by doing some of the cooking.  She makes really yummy enchiladas!

Yesterday we got 2 kitties.  They are NOT house kitties, but mousers!  We do have mice - part of living in the country - so they should be well fed.  They haven't ventured much past the garage yet.  The children are having fun playing with them.  Their names are Patriot and Expresso.  I am not a cat lover, but they are cute.  Sara isn't so sure of them and fusses when they get too close.

I have been very busy getting us settled down here and making dentist, orthodontist and chiropractor appointments.  Thanks to our Providence family, we had several good choices!  Sara and I have been going to the chiropractor and the adjustments have been starting to help my headaches/migraines.

We are also in the process of getting instrument lessons set up.  I have a good lead on a violin teacher and possibly a cello teacher.  Ashly is still playing the piano and wants to take formal lessons to improve her technique.  We'll have to see about a teacher and fitting it into the schedule.  Cara and Josiah will hopefully be starting soon also.  I will be teaching them the basics and we'll go from there.

Daniel has been enjoying the shorter ride to work.  His ride is still 50 minutes, but he uses that time for sermons, prayer, phone calls, and classical music.  A lot can be done in that time.  This week he is attending a Systems Engineer conference in New Orleans.  Living in Central IL has it's perks.  The airport is only 30 minutes away and small!  I believe he said there were 5 gates.  He flew from here to O'Hare at 6 am and was in New Orleans by 10:15 am.  Not too bad.

Tomorrow is our usual school day and applesauce day!  We have 4 apple trees with lots of apples.  The previous owners picked quite a few of them and the children have been eating alot, but there are still plenty for sauce.  What fun we shall have!

So that is what has been happening here.  Hope everyone has a great week!